close

Are you a parent? Were your children pre planned? If not & had the choice to not have children, would you do anything different? Weird question to ask especially after having the bundle of joys you love so much. Emotions & detachments aside… think about it.

It’s that time of year where I celebrate the most important day… MY Birthday! October 20th to be exact. Happy New Year to ME! Time to celebrate, correct? Yes, but for me it’s time to reflect. Time to think about the year that has just went by, what have I done, what have I accomplished, how comfortable am I with myself today going forward into my new year. The average person is so quick to “Turn Up” when it’s their birthday. Don’t get me wrong, I’m an entertainer & I love to celebrate ME but at the same time, I always make time to see what’s going on with ME.

A few weeks ago, I was in the recording studio with my best friend & engineer catching up on old times. Our birthdays are a day apart so we were talking about plans & then started to catch up on old times. We noticed that we’ve changed over the years but not only in the physical sense but mentally as well. We got on the subject about relationship status & babies. We noticed we’re all single & none of us have children as of yet. We must have been in-sync because we grew up wanting children but now questioning are they even in the cards anymore.

I was the young girl who wanted to get married, have 4 children (2 boys, 2 girls) big house, white picket fence & a golden retriever. Now at age 30, with a growing entertainment career, relationship status of single & don’t even date, things have change. There’s many steps to take before entertaining motherhood & when it’s time, would I even want to become a mother anymore? I’m still growing myself, learning myself, establishing myself. Relationship/Marriage to the side, am I financially stable, mental prepared & ready to have this major change in life? Yes, if it happens to happen I’ll just do what I’m suppose to do and be the best mother ever but while it’s still an option, do I want to have children or even one child?

Many young adults I spoken to around my age, had a similar vision growing up but now realize they’re not ready or never will be. Some feel that they are too selfish, don’t want to wake up in the middle of the night having to go to the hospital if the baby is sick or having to deal with the responsibility of getting their child ready for school every weekday morning. Some don’t even want to have to 2nd guess taking a trip out of state to an island if the opportunity presents itself. Right now, there’s no one holding them back but if a child is involve, they have to be considered in every decision they have to make from here on out.

So my QUESTions to you are: With your biological clock ticking, are you nervous? Would you feel less of a woman never conceiving?  As a man, are you ok with not having someone carry your last name? If you’re the type to want to wait until a serious relationship or marriage, are you concerned about the complications of having children at an older age? Could your future mate convince you to change your mind? What was your vision growing up verses where you stand today on this topic?

This is the Ms Gotta Love Me herself, it’s T-Quest Tuesday & you’ve just best Questified!
Show love by commenting below,  sharing & following me on all social media at TQuestGLM

Email me topics to discuss & QUESTions you may have. To learn more about me or to hear more about certain topics in dept please download my app “T-Quest” in your google play store & visit my website GottaLoveMeWorld.com

Tags : healthy relationshipsLifeLoveRelationship
TQuest

The author TQuest

2 Comments

  1. This has definitely been a topic pressing on my mind in the recent past. I used to want 4 kids and eagerly looked forward to being a father. Now at 35 with zero children and a failed marriage, I don’t know if I still want children. I certainly desire companionship, but leaving a legacy in that way no longer feels pressing. Maybe someone will be able to change my mind, but only time will tell.

  2. Great article Quest. What a way to get the new millennials thinking about a life changing discussion. To answer your question I would not change my dessition on having children. It’s the hardest job I ever had but it’s the most rewarding.

Leave a Response